Silence of my lamb

Our lamb was very silent last night at Easter dinner. A 7lb boneless leg of lamb certainly fed the four adults and daughter. As soon as in-laws left, wife sat down in front of the Mac and searched for leftover recipes. She typed in Google, “What to do for leftover…” and ham instantly popped up. I knew it! Too many people eat ham on Easter; I just couldn’t take another plate of cold ham with deviled eggs. She finishes typing, “lamb?” and finds several recipes but one stood out. It was a lamb curry from a British cooking website. If my wife does as planned, leftovers Thursday night will include a wonderful Indian dish served with Chole Masala over Jasmine Rice with Naan bread.

Since son returned home, he has decided to skip the naps and provide us with his unique-style of grumpiness and all-around feistiness. He has his moments though. As I have stated before, son loves to remove his pants and run around. Saturday, I left the room and returned to find the garage door open and son outside. I yell for him to return inside as he is sans clothing. When he does, he informs me that he had to go tinkle. Now, let me explain this so you can picture it. Our house has a bathroom beside the exterior door leading into the garage. Son bypassed this door to head toward the great outdoors. Luckily, he tells me that he went in the grass by the side of the lawn. I cannot imagine what the Homeowner’s Association would say about son’s fountain in the front yard.

Daughter, disappointed to be no longer at the beach, has also been in a grumpy mood. Two weeks prior to the beach she received a hand-me-down iPhone so that she can text and play games, watch movies, etc. She CAN’T make calls, though. I cannot imagine paying AT&T for another data plan. She has been playing on it too frequently so wife and I explain that she can use it an hour per day. Daughter did not like this plan, but nonetheless agreed to it. Last night, after Easter dinner, daughter asks wife and I if powering up the phone actually counts as minutes. The Drama!

As soon as mother-in-law walked in the house, she questioned why the Master’s Tournament was not on. This is nothing new in my life. When dad comes into our house to visit, he changes the TV to suit his desires which usually revolve around a golf tournament. My favorite instance when he does this occurs when I already have the TV tuned to a baseball game. He then explains how boring baseball is to watch on TV. At least they don’t whisper…Has my dad actually watched a golf tournament without his rose-colored glasses on?!?!?! Again, more drama!

My life needs less drama. I don’t expect the world to cater to my needs, but perhaps most of the world could lose the ‘tude, dude! Wow, that was actually painful to write, much less speak aloud. When you get to that passage just skip it or pretend I am Kenny Powers, closer for the Myrtle Beach Merman on Eastbound & Down. Many people are aflutter today about the recent episode of Game of Thrones where four sex-scenes take place. I actually think HBO goes out of its way to put extraneous and useless scenes to attract a younger audience. But hey, I tune in. I just wouldn’t watch it with mother-in-law.

Life is Good, Life is a Bitch, Life is a Beach. Whatever, Life is well, just life. Tomorrow daughter gets to take a state-mandated standardized test where she will continue to worry about a meaningless test. She has already explained several times that she needs rest, a hearty breakfast, and positive reinforcement.  Don’t we all?


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  1. #1 by Stacie on April 9, 2012 - 5:00 pm

    Our very own Manneken Pis!

    • #2 by skischulze on April 9, 2012 - 7:35 pm

      Maybe we should charge admission to our front lawn…

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