Posts Tagged blog

The Dog Days of Summer

Everyone has their special memories of Summer. The Summer Break was the reward for a difficult school year and often was defined by the family trip across the country going from one Howard-Johnson to the next. Recently, scholars began to question the negative impact of long breaks away from school and thus, the year-round school schedule was born. Whether you define Summer as Memorial Day through Labor Day or simply the week of July 4th, it will always remain significant in developing lasting memories.
Tomorrow, I go back to school to prepare for the 2011-2012 calendar year. It seems like it took the first six weeks to develop a working routine and then finally enjoy the last two weeks where the kids haven’t driven me crazy. Obviously, like the fact that I get eight weeks of vacation every year and do not want to simply give that up, but there’s always one guy in the crowd that complains teachers got it “too good.”
Those same people fail to see the symbiotic relationship my career has with their lives. If I teach their children, and I get eight weeks off, so, too, do the children. Those weeks in Ocean City require workers at the putt putt and Kandy Kitchen. The lifeguards go to college and they want the summers off too. In other words, if they want to enjoy their beach vacation, then I need to get those weeks off.
Consider this my last stand as I head back to work. I don’t want to work, but the Lottery simply has not been cooperating. I promise to take you around the world with me when I win, if your kids are on Summer Vacation. Otherwise, you’ll have to keep them enrolled so they learn how to act when they become independently wealthy.

, , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Leave a comment

Date Night and Harry Potter

Recently, I posted about an event my wife and I used to escape our children and enjoy what has affectionately been denoted “Date Night.” While we were out, my wife purchased a Groupon, the best thing if you’re willing to spend money in the first place, for a movie house that served dinner. Yet another opportunity to go out on the town arose.
You may be aware that I won an oyster eating contest by eating 100 in 6 minutes and 36 seconds offering me a gift certificate at a local bar. My wife immediately commandeered the money and slotted it for use when we could see the final installment of Harry Potter. It amazes me how much effort goes into arranging situations where people hire babysitters while they eat and be merry. There’s nothing wrong with this…really, I think after 7 straight days of changing diapers, I could use a break. I only have one. God help those with five.
The real question stands with the reasons why you want to go out. When you leave your kids to go on a date, does it feel all the sweeter to see them tucked into bed that night as you sneak in to give them that last goodnight kiss? Sometimes, it is just better to leave the kids at home while grownup activities occur. I doubt the patrons of that speakeasy in New York I visited would be considerate as my two year old had a tantrum about whether he could play with the candle on the table. Don’t feel guilty about leaving the kids behind, you are doing everyone else a favor!

, , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Leave a comment

Life in the fast lane

Last night, I went to the 2011 Summer Tour finale of Furthur, featuring the music stylings of Phil Lesh and Bob Weir. We arrived early, in fact, even before the venue was open. We drove around and discovered a gypsy-style camp where followers of the band and vendors were hanging out, hoping for a parking pass or miracle ticket. These individuals had been traveling with the band from town to town.
We often wonder what it would be like to give up our daily concerns and hit the road on tour with the band. The problem arises when you discover it isn’t 1969 anymore, and very little free love exists. The mom and pop diners and motels have given way to ultra-homogenized fast food restaurants and chain hotels that offer turn down service. While strolling through the vendors in the lot, we noticed the vibe that comes with $1 beers sold out of a trunk and a falafel grilling on a propane stove. But, like anywhere, there were those who had a gentle demeanor and those that were gruff.
The Grateful Dead survived on the ideals of sharing, but I wonder if too many of the current followers have gotten caught up in the fast lane and have forgotten the reasons they left their life in the suburbs. I had a great time and met people from all over, including a vendor from Colorado that sold us two children’s tie-dyed shirts. Every once in a while I notice I haven’t smelled the roses lately and I think we could all spend a moment to find and stop by them.

, , , , , , , , , , , ,

Leave a comment

Why kids can’t tell time…

When William Shakespeare penned the lines of Hamlet describing time as the undiscovered country, he joined the ranks of countless writers who saw it becoming a river, flowing, unstoppable, and others who saw the seasons as the four corners of life. Either way, they touched on the idea that we’ve all come to recognize; time poses as an enigma, a puzzle that is easy to waste, difficult to manage, and impossible to master.
Today, I visited Six Flags amusement park and realized time would become my enemy as I waited to enter the parking area and witnessed the pilgrimage of hundreds of patrons that would all find a way to be in front of me in the lines for the rides. My first ride took forty minutes and seven hours later, my last ride took sixty. In between, my daughter and I balanced the merits of the ride with the variable wait times. We eventually gave up and went into the waterpark.
My point to make today is that parents may not understand according to the Fresh Prince, but kids just don’t get time. “We’ve already waited forty-two hours (15 minutes)…” Tonight, as my daughter got ready for bed, she did so in the longest possible manner. See, the reason kids can’t follow the intricacies of time management is they don’t need to. Parents tell them when to be ready, when to eat, when to go to bed. They NEVER have to rationalize an early bedtime with an important meeting. This entry easily should illustrate that ignorance (innocence) is bliss.

, , , , , , , , , ,

Leave a comment

The ignorance(innocence) of childhood

This morning when I woke up, I knew I was in trouble. My daughter had a noon appointment with the dentist to have a cavity filled. Now, some people don’t like needles, but some people REALLY don’t like needles. She asked me yesterday if she was going to get a shot. I thought for a moment. If I lied and said, no, she would lose trust in me the next time she went to the doctor. If I said yes, she would have exploded into tears. What did I do? I avoided the question.
we spend so much time reassuring our children that bad things don’t happen to good people or pain doesn’t have to be a normal experience. After seeing me struggle in recovery of several debilitating surgeries, my daughter still asks me why I cannot do everything that other dads can do. She does know, though, that my pain has resulted in growth for the entire family.
So, the answer to the question of how much we should shelter our children is simple. AT ALL COSTS. Children shouldn’t understand the realities of life…That’s why it’s great to be a kid. Let them learn at their own pace.

, , , , , , ,

Leave a comment

Why guys like scifi…

Today, I watched yet another movie where aliens are invading earth and it is up to a few average joes, with aw, shucks, attitudes save the planet. From their infancy in the early fifties to this summer’s blockbusters including Transformers 3, which I am waiting to see tonight. Many writers like Isaac Asimov have broached the subject as to why people are fascinated with science fiction and I, of course, have come up with a small list of reasons guys more than gals head to the box office again and again to see a laser gun light up an alien transgressor.
1. Robots are just cool; they can do all the stuff we don’t want to and still have to obey the three laws. See I, Robot.
2. Women are always hot and may often wear spandex. Think Natalie Portman in Star wars.
3. The guy ALWAYS gets the girl. Think Star Wars, again..
4. One can actually get smarter if they use terminology heard on the show. Who knew about the Heisenberg Uncertainty Principle until Star Trek compensated for it in their transporters.
Finally,
5. A good science fiction knows when to blow up things and knows when to walk away…Mindless action films just blow stuff up, cause, it’s like, cool.

If there can be such movies as chick flicks, then there have to be guy flicks. Before you think about scatological and lewd behavior displayed in many recent big hits, remember that to truly impress a girl, you may actually try to pretend tone as smart as she is.

, , , , , , , , ,

1 Comment

Fashion police raid local gym (or should…)

This morning as I was dressing for the day, I knew I would be heading to the local fitness establishment and I actually thought, “Do these red shorts clash with my shirt?” I knew at that time I had crossed the invisible barrier of metrosexual behavior. Never considered a dandy, I now fear retribution since my fashion exploits are revealed. But that’s me; let’s talk about other people in the gym and comment on their apparel.
1. Never wear compression undergarments without shorts. Ever.
2. If you wore it yesterday to the same gym, do not wear today – even if washed.
3. Never to dress to impress. Everyone can tell.
4. Always choose technical fibers over cotton. Heavy sweaters especially.

Finally,
5. Never plan to dress as a couple at the gym. Period.

As you seek to slim or tone your body, remember you can do it stylishly or plainly and no one will ever comment directly to your face. I can only comment on what i war, but since I live in the south, thank goodness my gym prohibits cut-off jeans.

, , , , , , , , ,

Leave a comment

%d bloggers like this: